Our group was made up of students from a few different classes. Zhu Xiaohao suggested that we introduce ourselves so we could get to know each other. I glanced around and noticed that all the students were boys–a bunch of sad bachelors indeed!

"All the girls in the department were sent to one place, which we’ve nicknamed Jurassic Park," chuckled Dali.

"Watch what you say,” I laughed. “Don’t call them dinosaurs!"

"Well, you laughed,” scoffed Dali. “That just goes to show that you think of them as dinosaurs too!"

At this point, it was Dali's turn to introduce himself. He stood up and cheerfully said, "Hello everyone! My name is Wang Dali and my classmates all call me Dali-ge, or Miracle Worker Dali! I like listening to Jay Chou and I can even sing every one of his songs. If you don’t mind, I'd like to sing ‘Love Confession’ for everyone. I hope you all like it!"

The boys immediately shouted, "Please let us off! We’re begging you!"

Dali scratched...